A Tale of Aerials and Osteothingies

There is, we are discovering, a natural rhythm to this boating life. Periods of intense boating activity are interspersed with periods of staying put and mixing with them "English" (You need to be a lover of Harrison Ford's film "Witness" to get the derivation of this boating term . The discerning reader will,of course, also have noted that that the phrase "staying put" is not in any way connected with a phrase denoting "inactivity". Well at least, not while you have a Granny on board!

While speaking of the more mature woman, it is interesting to note how you can bring immense pleasure to her life by the mere purchase of a shiny six foot aluminium pole and a brass deck socket. "What is the old fool on about now!" you cry. Well if a boatman is to get a bit of piece and quiet in the day, herself needs to be provided with her daily dose of "Countdown" each afternoon at four (together of course with tea and cake). (As an aside, herself has declared that the girl Rachael is every bit as good as the Voordman with the numbers -the wardrobe is visibly smaller. If you are not a watcher of Countdown this will mean nothing to you and all we can say is............... "Get a Life!") To continue..... if this can be provided the Boatman is guaranteed some peace and quiet; provided that is the snores are coming in on his deaf side - the mature woman has perfected the art of "dropping off" in the afternoon. "And where is all this leading," you ask. Well you see it all comes down to TV reception and with all this moving about to frequent retuning.

Now if you want to ensure good reception a chap would say, "Buy the biggest aerial you can get. Look at this. Marvelous; 56 element job suitable for weak signal areas. Sorted". But the female mind does not work this way. She can't be doing with all that iron mongery on top of the boat. Makes it look untidy. Gets convinced by the man in the chandlery that this neat little Avtex job with built in signal booster powered from the aerial socket on the TV (5 volts) is the answer to a girl's dreams. In practice though, stuck to the boat roof with the very neat little suction mast it come with it's, we have to say, rubbish. His giant array of coat-hangers does the business. Which is where the shiny, six foot, aluminium pole and brass deck socket come in. She is convinced that the neat little job needs to be up higher and so the Braunston Chandlery provides the pole and we have to say,in our present resting place, at the top of the Ashby Canal, at Snarestone,........ she is right. There it sits, some 10 to 12 feet above the surface of the canal and we have good reception, digital channels and all.Countdown viewing assured. We wait with bated breath to see how it performs elsewhere. But,.............. he has also got a universal clamp so the array of coat-hangers can be rousted out and fitted to the pole in case of need. Nothing is going to get in the way of his afternoon peace and quiet.

People appear to either love or hate the Ashby Canal. This is rural, meandering, lock free boating. In places narrow, often shallow, no place for boy racers. No great industrial architecture of bygone ages either. Small settlements along its course. A coal canal, with, in its day some 28 pits of the South Derbyshire coalfield. Views over open fields with neatly trimmed, sloping sided hedges. This is hunting country. The Bosworth battlefield site and centre where the 32 year old Richard III met his end in Kings Field next to the canal. Well actually, probably not. The pleasant walks up Ambion Hill it seems do not look out over the battlefield site. Recent research and field archaeology appears to show that it was about a mile away. Still a good walk though and an interesting afternoon's visit. And for the steam enthusiast the restored Battlefield line Shenton station.

Since our last visit in October the number 7 bus now goes every hour and a half instead of every hour from Snarestone to Ashby. Which is where the Osteothingie comes in. You may recall from the last post stories of dodgy backs and grimacing. Well to cut a long story short, he who smugly declares that he has learned to manage his back problems will one day eat humble pie. And he has, by the bucket. Icing regimes, gel packs, sacro-iliac joints, nerve roots, inflamtion, analgesia and non-steroidal anti-inflammatory compounds all come in there somewhere. Lets just say he can now stand up straight (just) and may well be sleeping in a bed again tonight,emphasis on sleep.

On a more cheerful note we have re-aquainted ourselves with the delights of the Globe Inn by the moorings here, great Sunday Lunch (not served on tea plates), nice beer. As an interesting postscript, we left here in October to travel to Bath for the winter. It took us three weeks. From leaving Bath the return has taken us three months!